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Meet The People On My Airplane

Above the clouds
Elena Elisseeva

I made a quick weekend trip to Florida and had to put up with some pretty odd characters.

I jumped on a Spirit flight Friday night and returned last night. Usually when I fly, I try to read or catch up on my sleep. The flight home last night wasn’t very pleasant – I blame the people around me.

There was the jovial guy across the aisle from me. (Yes, “jovial” –  meaning heavy-set and loud.) This guy was ordering Jack Daniels and Cokes like the plane was going down! (OK, admittedly, a bad analogy.) When he wasn’t refilling his order, he was blasting out his loud rap-music in his very loud ear-phones. He was also swinging and swaying in his seat to every beat – which, I swear, caused the plane to suffer turbulence every few moments.

Then there was the woman behind me with her dogs. Yes, dogs. Not one, but two. In the same little carrier. Every time I was close to getting some shut-eye, I’d hear a bark or squeak from under my seat. (People! Leave your animals at home or with friends. Dogs HATE vacations!)

Over two seats and back two sat the woman who apparently works as a perfume tester. I could smell her the moment she step onto the plane. Yes, I get it. you like to smell pretty. Cough, cough.

Just ahead of me was the guy who had to check his carry-on bag in the overhead compartment every 14 minutes. “Yes”, I almost shouted, “your bag is still there! No one took it since you checked it last!)

Finally, a few rows behind me was “The Whistler”! This guy whistled on and off the whole flight. No that’s not annoying at all!

As Jerry Seinfeld once said on the TV show Seinfeld, “People….they’re the worst.”


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