‘Star Wars': the South Jersey Edition
How about some "Star Wars"? But, make it Jersey.
Margaret Thatcher said it first about something completely unrelated: "May the 4th Be With You".
In the present, that phrase has only one meaning: It's National Star Wars Day! Cue the John Williams music here.
John Williams via Youtube
Today is an excuse for you to plop your behind in front of the TV and binge one of the greatest sci-fi fantasy franchises of all time.
There are 9 total films in the 'Star Wars' main saga, however they were shot and released out of order. The list of all the film titles in chronological order based on the storyline, reads as follows:
- Star Wars: Episode I — The Phantom Menace (1999)
- Star Wars: Episode II — Attack of the Clones (2002)
- Star Wars: Episode III — Revenge of the Sith (2005)
- Star Wars: Episode IV — A New Hope (1977)
- Star Wars: Episode V — The Empire Strikes Back (1980)
- Star Wars: Episode VI — Return of the Jedi (1983)
- Star Wars: Episode VII — The Force Awakens (2015)
- Star Wars: Episode VIII —The Last Jedi (2017)
- Star Wars: Episode IX — The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
There are also, of course, Solo: A Star Wars Story and Rogue One: A Star Wars Story, however, they are somewhat distanced from the main plot of the saga.
Pause, if you will, to think for a moment what the movie titles would be renamed if the story didn't take place in "a galaxy far far away" amongst the stars, but right here in Jersey. Presenting our 9 titles for the "NJ Wars" saga (in chronological order)...
- 1
"NJ Wars: The Phantom In The Pine Barrons"
In Episode I of the "NJ Wars" saga, we meet a monster that haunts all those who dare to venture into the pinelands of Southern NJ. All those who are good, the creature we come to discover as the "Jersey Devil" shakes those who encounter him to their core.
- 2
"NJ Wars: The Attack Of The Bennies"
The second episode of "NJ Wars" shows how the South Jersey residents must defend themselves against the influx of out-of-state beach goers from NY, that usually only hit the beaches in Ocean and Monmouth counties. For some reason, they've ventured even more south. Now, South Jersey residents will stop at nothing to take back their beaches.
- 3
"NJ Wars: Revenge of the Shoobie"
It's local summer. After overcoming the Bennies that are so obnoxious and don't know how to act on the beach during the main season, South Jersey residents finally think they're safe to enjoy the beautiful beach landscape that they call home. That is, until one shoobie, a PA resident, books a last-minute vacation during the 3rd week of September, smack-dab in the middle of local summer, bringing with him 12 of his rowdiest friends and family members that ruin many of the locals' prime time beach enjoyment.
In true Star Wars fashion, we have the next few titles of the films in our NJ-based franchise, however the plots are still in pre-production (haha!). Take a look:
- 4
"NJ Wars: A New Beach"
- 5
"NJ Wars: The Jersey Devil Strikes Back"
- 6
"NJ Wars: Return Of The Lifeguards"
- 7
"NJ Wars: The Pork Roll Is Ready"
- 8
"NJ Wars: The Last Jetty"
- 9
"NJ Wars: The Rise Of the Scrapple-Lover"
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