South Jersey Moms Prepping For The Holidays Be Like…
Thanksgiving's right around the corner. Christmas right after that. It's a time to bask in the magic of the season, right?
Not if you're from South Jersey lol. Why? Because you know this is your mom right about now...
Am I right? She's running around like a chicken with her head cut-off imposing absolutely impossible expectations on everyone to live up to leading up to the family Thanksgiving party that she's already reminded about thirty-six times now which is less than 2.5 weeks away.
She means well, but she always tends to go a little nuts preparing for the holidays. Cut her a break, though. It's a lot of work. She's just trying to give everyone a magical holiday experience.
With that said, here are the 5 crazy rules South Jersey moms impose while preparing for the holidays...
Shoes Off In The Garage
This rule's not too crazy considering most of us remove our shoes immediately upon entering the house anyway, but South Jersey moms around the holidays take it a step further.
For some of us, our shoes have to be off before even entering the sun porch so there's no chance of "extra dirt".
Better yet, why don't we just ban all shoes from now through January 1st?
Limit The Number Of Dishes
Try not to leave any dishes in the sink. All that'll do is stress mom out since she's basically moved into the kitchen until the end of the family party. Chances are, she's already started to prepare certain dishes to freeze them.
Basically, get your sustenance from somewhere else until Thanksgiving.
All Holiday Decor Must Be Mom-Approved
If mom didn't give you the okay to hang up the Santa mooning the NYC skyline decal, for the love of God, dad, just don't.
You've been warned.
No Random House Guests
Since Mom's currently trying to turn the house into a Christmas museum, it's probably best that you at least tell her when you're dropping by or bringing friends over.
If not, you'll just overwhelm her. She wants her house to look perfect, or at least up to her standards before anyone from the outside world lays eyes on it.
Leave No Trace Of Life
Basically, make sure the house looks like no one's lived there for at least 2 months. It should look like a staged sample apartment used for showing potential tenants what their home could look like.
Crazy? Of course it is. But, that's why we love her. Also, don't try to fight her on it. Just meticulously pick up after yourself.
If not, she will come after you. She is a Jersey girl, after all.