I'm SO uncomfortable, grumpy and tired.

Another restless night, all because of the 27 mosquito bites that currently conquer my body.

I quite frankly have taught myself to "sleep scratch and slap"--aka subconsciously attack my attackers.


So based on my mosquito bites, I'm ranking (1-5) the absolute most uncomfy, itchy and WORST locations these little blood suckers can hit:


  • 1

    The Palm of Your Hand

    Like seriously mosquito? Were you SO desperate that you needed to invade the most random, and inaccessible part of my body. This little $h!t itches SOO bad, and yet, is the most unsatisfying to scratch because it kind of tickles...which is SO uncomfortable. And I used my hands all the time so like, how did you even get there and how did you have enough time to steal my life juice Mr. Mosquito? Considering that I talk with my hands I have to say that I'm a tad impressed you could stick it. KUDOS.

  • 2

    On Top of A Bone

    My poor wrist. And my Ankle. And my Knee. Shall i continue? Like seriously if I scratch anymore I may be able to say "hello" to my bones. And every time I walk or use that particular "bone" I FEEL MY DAMN MOSQUITO BITE. Let the itch commence.

  • 3

    Your Face

    I have no justification for this. Some people say "don't touch the face" and obviously mosquitos are savages and don't play by the rules. This is one of the worst places to get a bite because it looks like a swollen pimple and EVERYONE can see it.

  • 4

    Your Foot

    Yeah, mosquitos literally LOVE ankles. But I'm talking like the top of your foot where you can literally scratch until there's no tomorrow and then you're SCREWED because you then trailing blood across the living room floor. Case Closed.

  • 5

    Your Butt

    Mhm...Yeah. That little blood beyotch got me RIGHT on the behind. And also right underneath-- like by my upper/inner thigh. Which, quite frankly if I were a mosquito, I'd feel like a winner cause that's totally the most juicy part of my body. But holy crap does that thing ITCH. Sadly it's the itch you can't scratch in public....

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